Everybody is glad it's spring, and some folks are feeling their sap rising, so to speak. This is fine and natural, sometimes pleasant even. What is unpleasant is when people ignore boundaries. like the guy who accosted me this morning.

I'm on my way to work, almost to my building and i see this tall middle-aged guy, combover with glasses in a suit and tie approaching the other way. He looks like someone I know from the business school, so i nod to him, ahhh but then he speaks and I know it's not the guy I know from the business school. the dialog went something like this:

Strange man: "hey how are ya?"
Me: "Hi, I'm fine thanks..." and nod.
Strange Man: "You look really nice today, very spring-like ... "
Me (somewhat befuddled): "thanks... "
Strange Man: "how'd ya come to wear that outfit?"
thinking better of saying what immediately came to mind, Oh, my mother dresses me each morning, i simply said,
"I got up and got dressed, like i do every day."
Strange Man: "well you look so nice, like you'd cheer anybody up on a dreary day like today."
Me: "hhmmm ... "
Strange Man: "Where you off to?"
Me: "Work. I work right there." (I point to my building)
Strange Man: "Where do you live? here inPittsburgh?"
Me: "Yes"
strange Man: "Did you grow up here?"
Me: "Yes."
Strange Man: "Oh, really? Wherebouts?"
ME: "South Hills"
SM: " I know the South Hills, where?"
Me (I'm becoming a bit uncomfortable): "Mt. Lebanon" (I start feeling like i've given out way too much information to a stranger)
SM: "Oh it's very nice there. Did you go to High School there?'
Me (now definitely uncomfortable): "Yes."
SM: "Well, you look like must've graduated about 10 years ago. what are you, say 28 or 30?"
Me (Now quite uncomfortable): "Sure... something like that."
SM: "Say what's that you've got in your pocket? (Indicating my left pants pocket) Your wallet? your cell phone?" (And then he reaches over and tap-tap-taps the box of cigarettes n my pocket).
Me: "Cigarettes." (this, to my great joy, seemed to disgust him)

And at this point i've become so very uncomfortable, not only with the whole conversation but even just being near said Strange Man, and tell him:
Me: "I'm going to work now. Goodbye." And walked away.
Strange Man: "It was nice to meet you." and I continue walking nod and smile and dash across the street and into my building.

Let me be clear: I do not hate people who are old, gay, or Jewish (he was wearing a Yamuka (sp?) ). But I do feel awkward, flattered or not, when another man hits on me. Especially so when he gets in my personal space, and very very awkward when he reaches to touch me anywhere near my mid-section/crotch areas. I dont have a problem with walking away from an uncomfortable situation. I did not slug him, though I had thought about it.

My advice is two-fold . . .

1. Be polite, but don't be afraid to ask someone who suddenly asks you questions, tons of 'em, why they want to know so much about you. I should've asked him that, but i think I knew the answer already.

2. if you're trying to flirt with someone or pick them up, it's better to say something about yourself in additon to your barrage of Questions, rather than to interrogate them. Interrogation tends to make people feel like they're being interrogated, and like your up to something. If you feel like your being interogaed, feel free to ask, "What are you up to?" or "What's the point of all this?" If you're trying to pick someone up, dont get in their personal space, and DO NOT touch them, especially anywhere remotely near a personal zone. You're destined for failure and perhaps a black eye, broken nose or lawsuit . . .